Thai Massage: Quite painful actually

So nobody warned me Thai massage hurts! Steve & I went for one today – I asked my Thai mum where was a good place and she recommended this place. Never had one before. Everyone said they're great. So I'm there, expecting to be relaxed. Well, the pre-massage foot scrub was nice. And then we were each taken to a curtained cubicle with a mat on the floor. “Plee chayor kloh,” she requests, indicating a loose shirt and trousers. I start to undress, put the shirt on. Then the trousers. They have like a 60-inch waist. I'm not kidding. Which way round do they even go? Ah, probably strings at the front. Okay I'm ready – now what? Do I stand up? Lie down? I compromise and perch on the edge of the mat. I hear Steve giggling nervously in his cubicle. And then my masseuse arrives. She gets me to lie down on my back, and starts on my feet. So far so good – until she starts tugging at my toes until they click! Ouch! And then the legs. First she thumps me a lot. And then... Um, hello? Yeah, I'm not completely sure my leg actually bends that way... oh okay, apparently it does – if you kneel on it. Yikes, get your elbows out of my back. Um, hi? Yup, can't actually breathe now... Uh, I don't think my arm will... no, I'm wrong. Seriously, these girls are like WWF wrestlers! We're there for two hours. That's two hours of being pulled, prodded, pummelled and pounded. Can't say I feel all that relaxed, to be quite honest.